An Amazing Young Man Who Touches My Heart!

I am wanting to tell you alittle bit about my own life and then I'll exsplain why I felt the need
to write this blog, I hope and pray after you read it you will perhaps tell someonelse and they
will inturn do the same and we can bring as much awareness to this problem as is humanly
possible. I thank-you for taking the time to read my personal story I am going to shorten it aot, as I want more to speak of Jimmy Wayen, he is my personal hero, for what he is doing!

Okay now I'll share just alittle about myself with you, when I was born, my birthmother had
tuberculosis, so I spent the first 9months of my life in a BCG Clinic, when I left it, she did manage to take me with her, then when children's service found me I was living in well suffice it to say no child should ever live in those kinds of situations especially a baby, and no baby should ever be touched in anyway except to be loved. I am going to leave that part there.
Okay now we jump to my foster home, I was Blessed these people loved me, however they feared my birthmother and with good reason, she did attempt to steal me from them a few times to no avail, and once I was alittle older I was terriffied of her, I was smart enough to know she didn't want me to be a mommy if you know what I mean, anyhow my foster parents moved, infact they even took me to Prince Edward Island when I was alittle over 11, I at the time was told it was vacation, later much later I found out they were once again running from her, anyhow this was alot to do for a child as we lived in Montreal, Quebec, and thats quite aways to go. These people were amazing, they ofcourse had their problems as all families do, but I always knew they loved me, I never even questioned it, the only time I asked any real questions was when I had gone to school and they said why is the name on this different from your's. I didn't know what to say, I had been told several times I was a foster kid, so I said well I am a foster kid, oh the teacher said, why, well i didn't know the answer to that one, this teacher kept asking questions for which ofcourse i had no answers which seemed to anger him, none the less i didn't know so how could i possibly answer.
I went home in tears as many of the kids had decided this was a great thing they had someone to tease, and wow someone knew, they were going to have a ball, ha ha your a foster kid, the funny part was thinking back on it now, not one of us knew what it meant so we were just a bunch of silly kids, however it hurt, I didn't like them chiming over and over ha ha foster kid, and so on. Well as I got near the corner of my street the mean kid who lived there over heard their teases, he was known for his meanness and he decided to join in in his way, he took out his pellet gun and shot be in the back of my leg, oh well now I was really bawling, I reached my house ran in just crying my heart out, my foster mom asked me what had happened, her youngest son had come home and was listening to see why I was crying so hard, when I showed her where the back of my leg was all blue and sore, oh he was furious, he took off and headed up the street he grabbed that mean kid and told him if you ever hurt my baby sister again I'll come back here and make you eat your gun, he also made him appologize to me and never again did he bother me. But wow he had called me his baby sister, not his foster sister, wow I can't even begin to tell you how wonderful that felt, infact it meant oh so much to me its why I had to share it with you.
Okay now things begin to change, a few more years have passed, actually about 1 and a half to be exact, then they asked me if I wanted to be adopted, they really felt awful later when they learned they couldn't do that, they needed alot more than my saying wow really I'll be a real daughter, they needed my birthmother to say yes, well she wasn't about to do that. Infact she had me taken out of that home and placed in juvenile hall, only the first night they had no room so I was at the woman's prison, i was in a cell all by myself and kept safe, in the morning they took me to this place called Ville Notre Dame, I'll never forget that place, you had a cell where you slept, then they had a room where all the kids were to spend most of their time, you ate your meals there, there was a tv everyone sat around the table and we were only allowed to talk when they told us it was alright. In the daytime they had these classes where they tought you to knit, they were teaching us to make these squares so we could make slippers, now just by listening I had managed to make my squares, then they noticed I was left handed, oh you can't be taught they said, I didn't understand what I had done wrong, but suddenly I was in this jail, that's what it was, there were bars on the windows, at night you were locked in, and now I was to be locked in for all the hours that the other kids spent in classes because of being left handed. Well the judge sent me to this place way out in the middle of nowher, oh how I hated being there, it was called Marian Hall, and it was hell I appologize but it was. Anyhow I ran away from there and wound up living on the streets, running from police, good grief, imagine being 13yrs old and suddenly you have gone from having someone love you enough they wanted to make you their real daughter to being in this God forsaken place, to living on the streets, it was interesting, trying to stay safe, staying in one place and then another, always scared the wrong person would come in, or you'd get hurt by someone, the strange thing is, back then they didn't have numbers you could call for help if you were a runaway teen, if they got you they put you in Laval, it was locked up 23 hours of the day, 1 hour a day you were allowed out to either go outside or you could go to the pool they showed everyone on tv, they didn't tell them the kids were lucky if they had time to even get wet, as by the time you walked all the way there you were just about out of time and your hour was almost up.
I also met quite alot of other kids in the same situation, scared, trying to stay out of them awful places, the sad thing was, many took chances they went with strangers who promised them all sorts of things, many I never saw again, I would hear from someone that they had been killed and left. I was afraid but determined to somehow get off those streets, I hated them I called them the mean streets as they had taken many of my friends, well I saw a sign for help wanted, I went in and the guy hired me, I worked there, and he was a really nice person, he allowed me one pair of jeans and a new top so I would look nice for my first day of work, I prayed I didn't get caught that night as I just had to make sure to pay this nice man back, he was a young guy and I am sure he knew I wasn't as old as I said I was but he gave me a chance and I didn't let him down, when I had saved enough money I decided I was leaving and I did, my foster family knew where I was, they helped me so I could go, and thats what I did. They knew I could never have any kind of a life there not with them as she wouldn't let me, she hated that woman because she was everything she was not, she loved kids, she had had many foster children I later learned. Both of them are deceased now, I will never forget them as long as I live, to me they are my family, as I know without a doubt they did love me. When I got married I told my husband all about them, he said they must have really loved you, then ofcourse him being him he added honey what's not to love. God how I miss him, he is with God now, we will be together again someday, I don't think it'll be too awful long as I am ill, but now its time to talk about this young man I told you I feel is 'MY HERO"!

Okay there is a youngman his name is Jimmy Wayne, you might very well have heard of him, he is one amazing young man, he is walking across America to bring help and attention to the homeless kids out there, especially ofcourse the foster children, as the likelihood is most are, these kids live each day in danger, so many people prey on kids these days, they use them for slavery, if they get a child and that child is sold into slavery there is nobody who will ever see that child again, its not a movie, its real life, these kids can be hurt, so easilly, I was very lucky, it doesn't happen to many, alot of these kids get caught up with drug dealers, they get them hooked so they want the dang crap, then the next thing you know these little kids are working the streets, they get em dressed up,make-up and voila, nobody is the wiser except that kid, thats crying on the inside and so terriffied but too scared to ask for help. However with someone like Jimmy Wayne on the way, they now have real hope, God Bless You Jimmy Wayne, you are wonderful, you will be the reason these kids survive, they'll be off the streets and become proud American's and all because of you. You know whatelse I think is so very wonderful, many an artist, be it a country artist, or a movie star, they help out with different charities, oh theres many, however what do they all do, think, you got it, they take out their check book and write a check, now I am not saying that theres anything wrong with that, but i believe what Jimmy realized was if he did that, folks would say oh wow that's kool, and he'd likely be on his own, however by doing what he is doing, he is grabbing the attention of all sorts of people. I was so touched, I can't begin to tell you, oh God how I wish I had a way to meet him when he gets to the end of the line, I'd grab him and give him the biggest of hugs, if I was healthy, didn't need a walker to walk (thus you know why I didnt' try to walk too) anyhow I would just hug him to pieces for what he is doing, he is amazing.
Now what I am hoping to do, if you read this please please tell your friends and so on, orelse just ask them to please please contact cnn, we just gotta bring as much attention to this as we possibly can, we can't let this go, we must help him, he is on a journey to help kids, one of these kids could very well be one of your's or a neighbour's perhaps someone you went to school with, their kid ran away, and because of this young man, these kids now have something they never had before and that's HOPE!!! I beg you please please contact cnn, also if you watch Ellen, she has millions of viewers, if we could get her to give him a shout out, it would be so huge, please help in anyway you can. He isn't asking you for money, just click on his link, follow him on twitter and pleasse please tell your friends.
I thank-you from the bottom of my heart for reading this, please do follow him and tell cnn you think Jimmy Wayne deserves to be covered, because By God he does!

God Bless!!!!!!! ((((hugs))))xo

Darryl Worley - I Miss My Friend

Matt "Baby" this is a really special video and its just for you!!

God knows how very much I miss you, you were my husband, my best friend the love of my life and ofcourse my "Soul Mate"xo yoloving wifw, oh babe Imiss you so very much, it hurts so bad, God how it hurts!! your loving wife forever & lways!xoxo

Matt this is for you I remember so well!

Honey, well the Calgary Stampede is over, I missed you so much, when I watched to fireworks, all I thought of was oh wow Matt would've loved this, there so very pretty! I walked over the nite before last, this really nice young fellow gave me two free passes he didn't need them wasn't that nice of him anyhow I saw Martina McBride thanks to him, Lou had said he'd give me the 10 I was short but this was great cause it was so kind and I guess I really needed that, I miss you so much, remember this picture oh God I sure do, we had the fellow take it for us just before we met Tim McGraw, you really did like him so much, I'll never ever forget the happiness you had, I did too but to see you so happy meant everything to me.

Oh how I wanted you to be with me last nite, they allowed us all to sit side stage to see Martina, you love her voice, and she sure did knock it out of the park. Oh God I pray you could see her she was so gorgous, she didn't get off her bus but I did meet her husband, and I saw him once before the show started and I mentioned to him that they weren't gonna let those of us with handicaps sit side stage, he said well thats just not right, I am not sure but I have a feeling he just might have had a hand in helping us to be able to sit side stage, I had the best one, they were all so nice, the security, her one truck driver's name is Frank he was just as sweet as he could be, he gave me a pick with her signature on it, but you know that cause I put it infron of our photo on the mantel, oh Matt i miss you so much Baby, oh so much, remember "forever & always" oh God I sure do, Baby please please come bring me with you, I so don't wanna be here without you, I kept thinking ok, he wants me to see Tim for my birthday, well that's done gone, then I thought ok he wants me to be here for his, I didn't understand but I said ok, then I figured it just had to be the Stampede, well it too has passed, please baby Ineed you so so bad, and I wanna be with you, life without you just isn't life, if your wanting me to sue the hospital honey I don't have the energy I wanted badly to be able to do something to honour you, I haven't the money you know that, I never make it past 2wks after my check comes in, if I could believe me I'd build the biggest memorial to you this world has ever seen, I love you so much Matt you are my world, with you not here I have nothing at all to live for, I need you so, please come back and get me, you tried the damn phone rang and it woke me just before we left, oh how happy we'd be together again, I know its what I want, and I have no doubt of your love for me, baby come get me, tonite okay please!

Your loving wife, forever & always!xoxo

Will God Punish me if I join my husband on my terms

I miss him too much, it hurts so bad, I love the Lord, I always have, but its just so hard, I keep wondering when will it be my turn, I have been sick for alongtime now, and it should've been me, we both were prepared for that, well we had talked of it, and Matt also was sure it would be me, for that matter up until the last time my sweet baby went to the blasted hospital that is so very responsible for his death, even our doctor thought I would be the one to pass first. I was diagnosed a very longtime ago, so this is just mind boggling.
I live alone except for my cat, I live on good grief if I actually put it in writing it will seem like I am a idiot but its true, less than 500 a month, serious and thats to pay the cable, eat, you name it thats all, after my 750 for this dump I live in thats all thats left. If you think I am kidding about my living place, my cat caught a mouse the other day and I live on the 2nd floor so that tells you what sort of place this is. I live right next door to my pharmacy which is a help and they are nice, I am so damn lonesome its really ridiculous, I wish I was more wealthy, I want to do things, I love animals, and people I wish I could help all these people I see out there without a home but I know if ever I allowed one of them in I'd be homeless too, mind you perhaps then I wouldn't have to be so alone. Oh God why did you take him, I know he was hurting I even asked you not to let anyone hurt him anymore, but I didn't know they had stopped his treatment they went behind my back to do that, they lied out right on the chart and said they had my permission I had been adamant about him being treated at all times, God however can these people live with themselves knowing how very much pain they have caused, I miss him so oh so much, I don't wann a eb here without him I want to be with him I am done as I am not saying antything except will you please forgive me, I just can't do this without him anymore, Matt please please baby come get me please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My Beloved Husband

Hi Baby, I miss you so very much, everynite I lay here and wonder are you really okay, I ask God when will he come get me too so we can again be together, honey the only time I can say I know I was trully loved is when we were together, God how I miss you, I long to hear you tell me that you love me, or that you miss me, need me anything just to hear your voice, just one more time, oh God what I wouldn't give. I remember all the happy times we had together, oh the really awesome trips we took, remember when you thought I had won one thousand quarters and I promise I'll never ever forget the look on your wonderful face when I told you nope babe this is quarters its a thousand dollars, you were so very happy, that entire trip we had a blast. I cherish those earings oh so much, I won't change anything not a single thing, I have even your shoes still by the door, your coat is still hanging there I guess I hope somehow by some miracle I will wake up and this will all be a horrible dream, these past months will not have been real, you will still be right here with me where you belong, oh Baby I miss you I need you so very bad, in my entire life honey nothing has ever ever hurt like this, I don't know how to fix it, I really don't I try to pray, I ask God to please help me, I even tried to go to one of them grief thingy's the fellow said I was all over the place, what did he excpect, I know, the nurses know, the doctor's know and our doctor knows they literally killed you, they went against my wishes and I was your next of kin and lied through their teeth, without telling me and stopped all of your treatment and honey you know I didn't know, as long as I live I will never ever forgive them for what they did to you my heart hurts so bad, the night you needed me, I felt your calls as if the telephone had actually rung, it was that strong, I called up there, and honey I begged that nurse, I told her please I am pleading with you let me come up and be with my husband, I know he needs me, please I am telling you we are so very close I can feel his hurt as if he had actually spoken to me, and she said and I quote " he is fine, I just checked on him he is sleeping you can't see him until in the morning the door is locked" and then my phone rang at 6:30am and I was still awake cause as you know I was never able to sleep at night I worried too much about you and after I hung up I got there as quick as I could, hung up called a cab told them 20mins was too long as the hospital had called the man was so kind, he knew us both told me it would be there when I got downstairs and it was, the cab drove as quick as he could I was up there before 7am and a few minutes later the nurse pronounced you gone, I knew you weren't though, when I was holding you in my arms and talking to you I knew you heard every word I said and honey I stayed with you until after 12pm as I had always promised you there was no damn way I'd let you go before I knew for a fact you were gone and I kept my promise I kept all of my promises to you. I wish so much I could be with you, the doctor keeps telling me how very sick I am, wanting me to go here and there, I respect the heck out of him you know that but I don't know why he can't just realize all I want is to be with you, Matt you were and still are my life, I love you so very much, when we got married it was the happiest day of my life. I still remember us swimming first in the pool, oh what fun acting like a couple of kids, but we didn't care, oh how we loved, then we went to the lake, you even took "kiaa" for a swim with you, oh how loved we both were, she misses you, I can always tell when you are here, she will go to playing and purring and I know you are playing with your "baby" just like you alway have. She loves her daddy oh man how she loves her daddy.
I ran into Jarod today, he didn't know I had lost you, he was so sad, I hadn't seen him in a very longtime, at first he was all smiles, asked how's Matt doing, the look on his face when I told him he was literally in tears, that youngman thought a great deal about you sweetie, everyone who knew you thougth the world of you unless ofcourse they were jealous of you or if they had ever crossed you but then that would ofcourse be their problem.
I am going to go and rest, I am so very tired, "Baby" if its in your power, sweetie please come and get me, I am so very unhappy, and I don't have to tell you how very much my poor body is hurting, its really getting bad, I at times really can hardly bare it, I just want to go home with you to wherever you are, I know as long as we are together again we will be happy, please baby I am begging you come get me, you always promised me that you would, honey please come and get me, we belong together not apart please honey I really am ready, "kiaa" can come with us, together we can reach back and bring her too, please baby, I have asked you so very many times I thougth perhaps if I wrote it you would know I really and trully mean it when I say I just want to be with you please baby, my life is with you let's be together forever please, I don't want to live without you, the doctor says I am dying so what difference does it make if it is now or later except that its longer that I hurt, I love you Matt I miss you and I want to be with you so very bad, please baby come and get me okay, thank-you my love!

Your loving wife forever and always!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nashville

I know that the people of Nashville really need our help badly! I am so very upset with cnn, I have tried to tweet to Anderson Cooper several times, reminding him about the flooding in Nashville, it hasn't seemed to affect his choice of news stories one bit! I even mentioned you tube and told him, you were there you saw what has happened to that gorgous city, however it hasn't seemed to affect him, so I asked him to go to you tube. If you are reading this I ask the very same of you, I went to my site and because of my love of country videos, Kenny Chesmey's video was there, he is in a small boat and asking for help for all the people who have lost so very much, some have even lost their loved ones, orelse they are missing. If they were fortunate enough to not be flooded out, the odds are the places where they worked were, some lost both home and jobs. Its going to cost so very much to rebuild, like Kenny said, he is one of the lucky ones as he is fortunate enough he can afford to rebuild, however most aren't in his position. The really sad thing is nobody has flood insurance, infact the insurance agents were actually known to tell the folks they should save their money as Nashville doesn't flood. Which should've been the truth, they didn't tell them this to hurt them they trully believed it to be fact.
I watched several of the videos posted, this one really touched my heart. Some people had left their home, probablly fearing the water, but I hope that when they did leave, they felt their horses would be alright, I am sure they never thought for a second that the water would go as high as it did. I am serious, all you could see of these beautiful horses were their heads, they had gathered together by the barn, it was obvious they were terriffied, these passer - by's happened on the horses, they stopped their vehicles and with no thought for their own safety went and got a hold of a few boats, they then got some rope and placed it around the horses necks, they very carefully brought each horse one by one to the shore, I can't believe I am using the word shore in this case, however I don't know howelse to describe it. As soon as the horses could see they were getting close to where they would be able to put their feet on dry land they hurried to the land. By gosh does it not sound like they were in the middle of a lake, the trully sad part is when you see this thats just what it appears like, it is unreal, these folks are amazing, and I am telling you all the people of Nashville are like this. I used to drive a semi, its been quite awhile ago, however I made several trips to Nashville, always everyone was ever so friendly, I remember more than once stopping at the Truckstops of America, the fellow there at the desk was ever so nice, he always had some tickets for the Grand Ole Opry, he often would ask if it wasn't too late to see the show, would you like a couple of tickets, I have extra and I'd be happy if you'd use them and go enjoy a show. He was so nice, the folks who worked there were just like he was, always so helpful. I even met this gal, she worked for a tour guide place, she took folks on tours of the stars homes, she took the time out of her busy day to take me on my own private tour, I was just like alittle kid, she drove me by many of the stars homes, a few times we would see someone, always they too were as sweet as could be. I know you hear the saying the people from the south are friendly and think ya right, but I am telling you I never met one person in that city that I didn't like. I will always remember this onetime, I had my car, and I had decided I wanted to go on my own and visit as I had some time, so I did just that. Well I bought one of those maps of the homes of the country stars, and I hoped my memory would also help some anyhow I was driving down this one road and I knew I was really close to Lori Morgan's home well I decided to pull over and snap a couple of pictures, well the front door opened, this teen ager came outside. I asked him if it was alright to take a couple of pictures, he was as nice as he could be, he said sure go right ahead, he then told me if I waited for about 20mins, his mom would be coming out as she was getting ready right then to go to the Opry, this was Lori's teenage son, and sure enough she did come out, she is such a sweet lady, oh gosh and just as pretty as she could be, I was so tickled. Another artist I will never forget is Tim McGraw, I was also lucky enough to meet him, both my husband and I met him it wasn't in Nashville though it was here in Calgary where I now live. My husband had leukemia, and I lost him this past Dec3rd to be exact. One of the happiest days of our lives though was the day we met Tim, he was so nice, he joked and kidded with us both, we also met Faith, she is just adorable, and if you have ever seen an interview of Tim where he mentions Faith, he always says if you meet her, you can't be in a room with her for more then 10mins and not fall in love with her, well he speaks the truth, we both just loved her to pieces. She spoke with us for quite awhile, posed with us for a coupld of pictures, he was so happy, he often spoke of that day, it was one amazing day for the both of us.
When I saw Tim and Faith on Anderson's one show he did from Nashville, you could see how genuinely upset and worried they both were, they took him and showed him the huge amount of destruction this flood had caused. I wasn't at all surprised to read today that they are putting on a huge show on June 22nd, the ticket prices are just abit over 20dollars, the line-up is amazing, you have everyone from Carrie Underwood, Lynard Skynard, Taylor Swift, Kellie Pickler, Brooks & Dunn, Martina McBride, oh gosh there are so very many, I'd still be here typing this time tomorrow if I continue to list all the names, suffice it to say it will be one amazing show, oh I will also mention Toby Keith and Keith Urban as they just came to mind. I know I would love to be able to be there, they have said it would be televised nationally then I heard it would air on GAC oh I so hope thats not the way it goes, as if your not in the USA you don't get GAC and for that matter many folks who do live there said they didnt' get GAC. I hope its national, all the proceeds from this are going to help the flood victims, these are the kind of people that Tim & Faith are, they give so very much, and always are first on hand wanting to know what is needed and how they can help. Also there were thousands of volounteers from different churches going from door to door all through Nashville trying to help out in anyway they could. I am so very impressed by how this town has come together and are doing all they can for each other trying to get some kind of normalacy back into their lives. I am far from Nashville, and as much as I wish I could do like Taylor Swift and call into Vince Gill's telethon he held and donate 500 thousand dollars I sure can't do that. But I have been doing whatever little I can, I posted Kenny's video on both my facebook page and also my twitter page, I also have been tweeting any and everything that I read or if someone tweets something that is relevant to the flood than I retweet, its not much but I am trying, and ofcourse I am keeping Nashville in my prayers. I hope that anyone reading this will try to do whatever they possibly can, these folks really need alot of help, remember they need us, if you donate by phone your billed only 10dollars at the end of the month, that is helpful, the Red Cross said they had raised alittle over 4million dollars for the people of Nashville. I hope and pray that these folks will be able to rebuild, I know its going to cost alot but if we all give just alittle it will add up to awhole lot, and then perhaps we will have our beautiful city that we all know and love! I thank-you from the bottom of my heart, all the very best to you all! Good night and God Bless!

The Greatest Man Who Ever Lived

My husband oh God what a wonderful life this man made for me, he was so amazing, I have never in my entire life loved or been loved as I was by him, Matt Groves is and always will be the greatest man I ever knew.

We found out six yrs ago he had somehow come down with leukemia, they gave him six months to live, I didn't know what to do as we couldn't get him a bed and three and a half months had passed, but God helped out, this woman was so ignorant, I had gone up to put us in for early voting and she said whats he wanna vote for he's dying, well the others heard her and the next day a bed was available. Not once did I ever hear this man complain, his only concern ever was for me and our baby "kiaa" he loved her as did I as if she was a baby not a cat. Oh he was only worried if God forbid he didn't make it through the chemo what would happen to us, how unselfish and how he loved us. I have never missed anyone in my life as I miss him, I so wish that God would have taken us both, its just so very hard being here without him, he was my whole life, his life was stollen from him, all he wanted was Christmas, but nope they went behind my back, contacted a brother who he had no contact with for yrs and wanted none, he had the nerve to go up, behind my back and stop all his transfussions with his pen. By the time I found out it was too late too much had happened he was so weak, he suffered so terribly, he wound up dying by choking on his own blood and they didn't even attempt to help him, as they said he was dying anyway, whatever happened to compassion is there any left in this world, I sure don't feel much like there is rightnow, God I loved that man with my all, I just wanted him to have his Christmas it meant so much to him, as last year he was in the other hospital all through the holidays. If only he would've been at that hospital I could've been with him as before stayed nights and never left him alone kept my eyes and ears wide open. These jerks would make me leave at 9pm and as I was leaving, now you do know you might get a call in the middle of the night, ironically the am of the meeting where I was to arrange for an ambulance to bring him home so I could look after him myself which is what he so wanted he died. Coincidence hard to believe if you had seen all I have. I just want you to know Baby I love you I always will, I miss you so very much I can't wait till I see you and we are together, God willing it will be soon!
You are and always will be the love of my life, you are my everything Baby, God how this hurts I can't make it stop, nothing helps, oh I misss you so,I didn't even know it was New Years.
Happy New Year Baby. I know they can't hurt you anymore, nobody will ever hurt you again, your my precious Baby and I am so happy they can't hurt you thats the one thing I am glad for I so wish I could've been there for you, I knew you needed me, I felt you so strong when I phoned they lied told me you were sleeping sound, I couldn't come up ofcourse, then a few hours later our phone rang and they said you need to hurry, 2minutes after I got to you they pronounced you dead. Baby I was there in 20 mins, its near impossible, I tried so hard, I pray you know, oh God how I need to know that, I love you my sweet, I miss you as does "kiaa" she often cries for you as do I, I have never stopped I don't know how to, however do I keeep going without you, and your brother is going to pay dearly for what he did to you thats a promise my love, I didn't know I could feel such hatred for anyone as I do him, how you suffered and all because of him and that nurse oh its not over its only begun I will do this for you at least, I will get justice for you I promise you that with my all, Matt I have always done whatever I could this time they tied my hands, well honey there untied now and this bitch will get you justice!